Archive for the beautiful Category

self-lovin’.

Posted in beautiful, friends, happyness, inspired, Life, Love, quotes, randomness, rant, revelations, The Wonderful Internet on 01/11/2011 by asante

Raise your hand if you can confidently and without a doubt say that you love every single minute thing about your body, yourself, who you are, etc.

Don’t worry. I’ll wait.

Nobody? alright then. That’s what I thought. Why is that?

It’s frustrating and sad. Even the most outwardly confident of us all have something they take major issue with.  Too big, small, loud, quiet, sticks out too far, too short, too long, yaddayaddayadda. And then we try to justify all of this in the name of “self-confidence” “conceitedness” by throwing in “well at least he/she/it has it worse than me.” WTH? That’s not self-confidence. That’s petty and destructive. And it’s not going to work anyways.

So why do it? Sure, at the end of the day you’ve created a booster seat with the pile of dashed self-lovin’ of other people, but if you have to KEEP DOING IT, clearly it’s not working.

My dear sister, who makes her home on the interwebs over at Les Coeurs Solitaires posted this fabulous quote the other day. Thought I’d share with y’all :)

“At some point in your adult life, you’ve probably walked into a party and felt a frisson of relief upon discovering at least one woman there who was fatter, uglier, and/or dressed more inappropriately than you. We sure have. But if you want to have any hope of making peace with your own body, you need to knock that shit off.

We’re not even telling you to stop just because it’s nasty, petty, and beneath you to judge other women so harshly; it is, but because you’re not a saint, and neither are we. We’re telling you to stop because it’s actually in your own self-interest to stop being such a bitch. ‘Cause you know what happens when you quit saying that crap about other women? You magically stop saying it about yourself so much, too.

Judging other women negatively creates a constant stream of nasty thoughts in your head. It is inevitable that you will end up applying those same standards to yourself. We think we’re building ourselves up when we do this but, really, we’re just tearing other people down to our level. And we hate to go all Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood on you, but tearing other people down isn’t really productive. It leaves you in the same place you started, which is full of loathing for your own body. “

–Excerpt from Screw Inner Beauty, by Kate Harding and Marianne Kirby

And the church says AMEN. Let 2011 be the year we let go of petty crap, self-destructive thoughts, and unnecessary negativity about ourselves, and everybody else for that matter. Please and Thank you.

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Another year gone by…

Posted in beautiful, Family, friends, happyness, Life, memories, music, quotes, The Future, The Holidays, Uncategorized on 12/31/2010 by asante

Another turning point;
a fork stuck in the road.

Time grabs you by the wrist;
directs you where to go.

So make the best of this test
and don’t ask why.

It’s not a question,
but a lesson learned in time.

It’s something unpredictable
but in the end it’s right.
I hope you had the time of your life.

–Green Day

2010 has come and gone.

May the upcoming year bring you bigger and better things than the one before it.

[in 5…….. 4…….. 3…….. 2…….. 1……..]

 

happy new year!

Quote of the Day…

Posted in beautiful, happyness, inspired, Life, quotes, randomness on 11/18/2010 by asante

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all, I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”

–Agatha Christie

black is beautiful.

Posted in beautiful, Family, happyness, Love, Me, memories, randomness on 11/16/2010 by asante

I’ll say it loud and proud: I love my skintone.

Dark, chocolate-y, ebony, whatever you want to call it, I have it, and I love it. I inherited my daddy’s super-deep-dark African complexion, and I plan on rocking the hell outta all this melanin for years and years to come. No hate whatsoever to my friends and readers of a lighter complexion, but personally I think there are few things more fantastic than deep brown skin.

I think it’s clear that the whole Darkskin/Lightskin dichotomy never really affected me that much. I’m lucky enough that it was never a major issue for me, at least as far a insecurities go. I scoffed at my family members back home overseas who would ask us to send them “lightening” creams. I was fully aware that I was dark skinned. And I embraced it. No problem going out to the beach or pool basking in the sun. It still baffles me to this day how much weight some people place on this, how much of their story is defined by feelings of inadequacies based in the deepness or paleness of their skin.

I saw this video today, and it really stuck with me; seeing women of all backgrounds still facing the same struggle of feeling like the deep tone of their skin makes them somewhat inferior. STILL. In 2010. Like, what?! I thought we’d be off that by now :(

It’s disheartening, to say the least. But I do commend the women in the video for not only approaching acceptance and self love of their hues, but doing their best to share those sentiments with others :) (that little girl just broke my heart!!!) I’m grateful to have been raised in a household where it was never a major pre-0ccupation. I escaped that particular brand of self-doubt, and managed to emerge not only with a level of acceptance, but a high level of adoration for it :) I really hope that others will start to realize that there is so much to be said for loving what you’ve got, and can get to where I’m at about this particular issue. Self love rocks!

I remember waaaaay back in high school, one day in art class, my teacher Mr. Newman was discussing mixing colors to recreate flesh tones, as we were painting a live model that week. As the only “other” in the room, (I attended an overwhelmingly predominantly white private school, so people who looked like me were few and far-between. Hence the high level of bouge I proudly display today. lol.) he decided to choose me as a guinea pig to show how to mix skin tones. He took my forearm, an array of paint, and a palette knife, and began mixing colors right there against my skin, trying to match the color, all the while lamenting the fact that our model was caucasian, and in his opinion, unfortunately her skin wasn’t as interesting as mine. 20 minutes later, he had added blues, reds, yellows, coming close, but not quite. It was a crazy scene, and took a lot of turp to get off, but it was a fantastic display of just how dynamic dark-brown skin can be. Paleness be damned!!

That moment stuck with me, and to this day I take every opportunity to relish in all my black-coffee-colored naturally Coppertone-d awesomeness. I love the way the sun makes my skin all glow-y. I get super excited when I get a lil’ tan and I’m even darker than usual. I play it up, show it off, and otherwise flaunt it in any way possible. It makes me giggle seeing people baking all day under the sun trying to get what I’ve got. Deep brown/red/yellow/blue/black-toned deep dark chocolatey skin. I laugh it off when someone tries to hate on dark skinned people, because I know deep down it’s not disdain, it’s envy. Not as dark as me? You maaaad lol. It’s ok. Have a tissue.

I know I’ll never be a “redbone” or “lightskinn-ded” or “bright”. And that’s how I like it. thankyouverymuch.

my black is b-e-a-UTIFUL. Period.

I think it’s clear that the whole Dark/Light dichotomy never really affected me that much. I’m lucky enough that it was never a major issue for me, at least as far a insecurities go. I scoffed at my family members back home who would ask us to send them “lightening” creams. I was fully aware that I was dark skinned. And I embraced it. No problem going out to the beach or pool basking in the sun.

my mantra :)

Posted in beautiful, happyness, Ink/Holes, Me, quotes, randomness, The Wonderful Internet on 11/06/2010 by asante

I wish I had known there was more to this quote! My tattoo would gave been a lil’ more awesome.

i love my hair!

Posted in beautiful, hair, happyness, inspired, music, news, randomness, The Wonderful Internet, video on 10/14/2010 by asante

One time for Sesame Street.

Seriously. I’m a fan from wayyyyy back, (Gawrsh has it really been 20 years since I was their target demographic?! O_O) so I’m glad that PBS is still putting out quality learning-ness for the kiddies to this day. (Get the heck on, Barney.  *side-eye* lol)

They did a clip featuring a monster with natural hair! (well, curly. but close enough lol). I thought this was the cutest thing ever, and I hope they keep this clip around in the future for my one-day napped-out babies to watch too lol.

Song of the Day…

Posted in beautiful, happyness, inspired, Life, Me, music, quotes, randomness on 10/12/2010 by asante

I love this song. Lovelovelovelove. It’s one of those songs that gets my day going, puts me in a good mood, and if i wasn’t in a cubicle, it would probably get me singing at the top of my lungs lol. If humans had the power to have soundtracks to their lives, I would want this song to play every time I entered a room lol.

I need something to get me hyped today, and this song is just the ticket. Good morning y’all, enjoy :)

I wanna thank you for every time you tried,
To get the best of me inside,
How many times I compromised
I don’t do this for the glory,
Or for what people might say.
I’m gonna do this my own way,
Starting today…

There’s nothing that you can tell me,
I’ll show you I was born ready…

And I say AY YO,
Rise up, lemme see your head high
And if you’re with it put your hands up in the sky,
La da di di da da di di da da da
Ay yo ay yo ay yo AY YO,
And I’m gon’ rock it to the fullest in this life,
So I’ma give all I got before I die,
La da di di da da di di da da da…
Ay yo ay yo ay yo…

Every woman has a purpose,
Nothing happens by chance.
This is your life here in your hands,
You gotta fight to take the stand
And I know you might not see it,
But the high can fall so fast,
When you’re in first don’t forget the last,
You gotta give it all you have…

Oh life can be unforgiving,
I’m fighting to keep on living…

And I say AY YO,
Rise up lemme see your head high,
And if you’re with it put your hands up in the sky,
La da di di da da di di da da da
Ay yo ay yo ay yo AY YO
And I’m gon’ rock it to the fullest in this life,
So I’m a give all I got before I die,
La da di di da da di di da da da…
Ay yo ay yo ay yo…

If you have a light,
Then hold it up and let it shine,
Would you make the choice to meet your destiny,
Or let this lifetime pass you by?
Only you can make it,
What’s yours is yours no one can take it,
If you have a dream,
Something you believe,
It’s time to set it free…

And I say AY YO,
Rise up lemme see your head high,
And if you’re with it put your hands up in the sky,
La da di di da da di di da da da,
Ay yo ay yo ay yo AY YO
And I’m gon’ rock it to the fullest in this life,
So I’m a give all I got before I die,
La da di di da da di di da da da …
Ay yo ay yo ay yo…