Such a dramatic topic, lol.

But when it comes down to it, we all want it, right? Or we’re in it, or we’re running through several alcoholic beverages cursing its existence. lol. Love is a crazy thing. From every angle.

Those of y’all who know me (or keep up with the blog :) know that I’ve been in a relationship for a little over 4 years now. And though I hear a lot of chatter from my friends about how we are the “greatest couple” or “the last hope” etc. nobody’s perfect. Definitely not F and me. We’ve had our ups and downs, just like every other couple has. It just goes to show that you can’t possibly understand a relationship and how it functions unless you’re in it. It’s a completely different world lol, and no two are the same.

For my part, I try not to give too much specific relationship advice. I don’t want to come off as arrogant, and hell, it’s not like I know what I’m doing half the time. Bottom line, nothing worth having comes without working for it. I mean just thinking of some of the relationships my friends are in, NONE of them are without issues, but the people in them are willing to work through the hard stuff and keep it going, because they love each other. Of course one would hope that they’re not settling, (because settling for a major factor in your life is clearly an AWFUL idea) but really who are we to judge? All I know is what I see from the outside perspective, and there’s likely a whole facet of that relationship I don’t see.

The tough stuff is what i think really defines the strength of your relationship. A wise man once said:

“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”
– Martin Luther King Jr. 1963

Everyone wants their relationship to just be all hugs and kisses and flowers and sparkly gifts and naughty bedroom scenes all the time. It’s not like that lol. Nuh-uh. Anybody who has been in a significant relationship will tell you that’s a fact. But it’s how you approach the bad stuff that determines whether you can get back to the good stuff, am I right?

F and I have definitely had our issues. My friends probably wouldn’t believe me, just because to them, we seem like this couple that can do no wrong lol. But we’ve had our share of hardships. But so far, we haven’t come across anything that was bigger than our feelings for each other, and we have managed to come out stronger on the other side. It’s not perfect. Trust me. But it works.

But it doesn’t have to be perfect to make you happy. Definitely not. Sometimes it’s more about the dumb little things more than anything else lol. Like how F will let me ramble on and on even though we both know damned well he would rather be listening to anything else in the world lol. Or how I actually can really enjoy watching him play his video games (“Prototype”, “Arkham Asylum” and “God of War” are pretty intense, I can’t lie lol). What’s really important is that on some level that nobody else needs to understand, you each understand that the other person is exactly what you want in a partner. They make you happy, and neither of you give a damn what the rest of the world thinks.

Because they don’t matter. The only one who does, is the person on the other end of that late night phonecall, or that person with their fingers alternating with yours, or that person who will drive across town to kill the spider you found in your closet, or send you the exact message you needed to hear to get you through your day.

I’ve decided I need to stop judging others relationships. Because just like nobody knows everything about mine, I have no idea about theirs. Who am I to say that “she can do better” or “he doesn’t really love her” or any of that other mess that I tend to spout from time to time. Because I don’t know. I wouldn’t want people talking mess about me and F either. All that anybody needs to know about someone else’s partnership is that the two of them care enough about each other that they put in the necessary work to make it continue to work every single day. And that’s commendable.

L.O.V.E. It may not happen when you’re expecting it, but when it does, you’ll know. Because you’ll both be ready to do whatever it takes.


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